Some individuals carry a lot knowledge, I make it a degree to pay attention each time they converse or write. Rodger Dean Duncan is one of them. It’s no shock he has achieved phenomenal success as a global bestselling writer, former senior Fortune 100 enterprise govt, and member of two prior White House administrations. If you’ve ever questioned how he positive factors such perception, this visitor publish — From Curiosity to Connection: The Art of Asking and Listening — reveals his secret.
It’s essential to notice that I neither accepted nor acquired any compensation for publishing this weblog publish. My sole goal for publishing this piece is to share a helpful useful resource with you.
–– Frank Sonnenberg
From Curiosity to Connection: The Art of Asking and Listening
As a younger boy, I used to be interested in most every little thing round me. I peppered the adults in my life with a barrage of questions: Why gained’t fish chew on lifeless minnows? How do you sharpen a noticed? Why are cucumber seeds planted in mounds? What makes thunder and lightning? Is anybody older than God?
My early academics, particularly my grandfather, at all times had a affected person reply — liberally seasoned with a heavy dose of frequent sense and typically a sprinkle of humor.
I carried that inquisitive nature by my college days and into my maturity. It served me effectively as a younger journalist once I interviewed attention-grabbing individuals like Lyndon Johnson, comic Jack Benny, Baroness Maria von Trapp, cardiac surgical procedure pioneer Michael DeBakey, historian Arnold Toynbee, pollster George Gallup, luxurious retailer Stanley Marcus, anthropologist Margaret Mead, and tremendous investor Warren Buffett. I traded jokes with artist/illustrator Norman Rockwell and mentioned residence carpentry with film idol Robert Redford.
Of course, I’ve additionally talked with hundreds of not-so-famous individuals. They’ve all had tales to inform and opinions to precise. I’ve realized one thing each time.
Yes, I’ve realized to ask good questions. But extra importantly, I’ve realized to pay attention. Really pay attention.
Whether we’re interviewing a well-known particular person or chatting on the sidewalk with a neighbor, centered listening is among the many most beneficiant presents we may give to different individuals — and to ourselves.
Here’s what centered listening does:
Builds stronger relationships. Shows respect and care, deepening private and skilled relationships.
Enhances understanding. Helps you absolutely grasp different individuals’s views, decreasing misunderstandings.
Improves downside–fixing. Gathering all data results in higher, extra knowledgeable choices.
Boosts empathy. Truly listening to somebody’s ideas and emotions fosters empathy and compassion.
Encourages open communication. People really feel protected and valued, making them extra prepared to share truthfully.
Reduces conflicts. Helps stop misinterpretations that may result in arguments.
Builds belief. Demonstrates reliability and integrity.
Deepens studying. Absorbing data attentively improves information and abilities.
Increases endurance. Listening encourages you to decelerate and interact.
Strengthens reminiscence. Helps you keep particulars and recall data higher.
Boosts creativity. Exposure to various viewpoints sparks new concepts and innovation.
Cultivates humility. Recognizing others’ insights reminds you there’s at all times extra to be taught.
Just earlier than he died, my longtime good friend Stephen Covey (writer of 7 Habits of Highly Effective People — extensively considered probably the most influential private growth ebook of the 20th century) was collaborating along with his daughter on a ebook titled Live Life in Crescendo: Your Most Important Work Is Always Ahead of You.
I’ve taken that sentiment significantly. I may have comfortably “retired” many years in the past. But I discover nice satisfaction in interacting with good individuals. And listening.
Today, I write a Forbes column that reaches thousands and thousands of readers. Most of my columns are primarily based on my conversations with so-called “thought leaders.” They’ve earned that appellation as a result of their views are taken to be authoritative and influential. They suppose massive and they are saying issues price listening to. (I’ve interviewed Frank Sonnenberg a number of occasions.)
And in honor of Stephen Covey’s encouragement to “reside life in crescendo,” on my 81st birthday I launched my LeaderSHOP podcast. The conversations you’ll hear on my podcast are with some of the neatest individuals round. I recognize their generosity in sharing their time in addition to their opinions. Check it out. I imagine you’ll agree it makes for good listening and good studying.
Without an excellent query, an excellent reply has no place to go. So, ask good questions. Then, as Frank Sonnenberg suggests, pay attention along with your mouth closed.
Dr. Rodger Dean Duncan is the bestselling writer of CHANGE-friendly LEADERSHIP and host of the LeaderSHOP podcast. Click right here for a free copy of his ebook.
Check out Frank’s newest ebook, Values to Live By: Know What Matters Most and Let It Be Your Guide
Are You a Good Listener?
Please depart a remark and inform us what you suppose or share it with somebody who can profit from the data.
Additional Reading:
Regardless of Circumstances, What We Become Is a Choice
Ideas to Transform You from Good to Better to Best
Life Lessons: Become The Best Version Of Yourself
In a World of Bad Behavior, a Call for Personal Accountability
Frank Sonnenberg On Matters That Matter
You Are What You Eat … And What You Read
Need a Pick-Me-Up? Try Values to Live By
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